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Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Dear United,

Remember me?

I just wanted to let you know
I really enjoyed my trip to Denver yesterday.
That hour and a half I was there was unforgettable. 
Between the incompetent customer service man and the chocolate ice cream I ate, 
I was bursting at my seams with excitement.
What a vacation, right?

What could possibly be better than flying two hours to Colorado
only to fly two hours back to the city I just left?
I find no greater joy than spending my day 
making round trips to cities I have no need to be in.

But see, if we're being honest,
you made me really angry yesterday.
All I was trying to do was get back to Lubbock.
It's not hard.
In fact it's pretty much a diagonal line across Texas.
No big deal.

So why would you make me fly to Denver?
That's two states away.
Coincidentally, it's also nine hours from Lubbock, just like Houston.
So clearly, that would be the most efficient route.

Then on top of taking me two states away,
 you make my connecting flight less than 30 minutes
 from the time I land in Denver.

So even though I sprinted all the way across the Denver airport
(a real accomplishment considering I do not run)
I made it just in time to find the plane was "closed"
Despite the fact that I could still see the plane sitting at the gate,
you wouldn't let me on.

Making me miss my plane is one thing.
Making me miss my plane 
when there are no flights available to Lubbock for two days,
is inexcusable.

So here were my choices:

1. Stay in Denver, pray to get on a standby flight. 
2. Fly to Dallas, stay there pray to get on standby.
3. Fly to Memphis, stay there pray for a flight.
4. Fly back to Houston, stay at home, wait until Wednesday, get a definite flight.

So I chose to fly back home to Houston.
And miss two days of classes.
And all sorts of other things.
Hopefully, I'll be back in Lubbock on Wednesday afternoon.
But with all this, who the heck knows.

And for all my troubles I got 30 dollars in meal vouchers,
 a 150 dollar ticket voucher,
a two hour flight home on a tiny plane with a screaming baby 
and a ghetto fabulous flight attendant, named Yolanda.

A real consolation prize if you ask me.

Oh and, Yolanda, it's a good thing you wear a uniform because if you think 
neon blue eye shadow up to your brow bone is professional,
I'd hate to see what you'd wear to work if it was your choice. 

So thanks United for my mini vacation.
I did not enjoy it as much as you did.


Sincerely,
Natalie 
(the girl you screwed over yesterday)

4 comments:

Bree said...

wow, that is ridiculous! Sorry you took a mini vacation; I'd of been furious if I missed two days of school because of that! Hope you start having a better week girl!

Ali-Cat said...

Hope your week gets better girl! You totally deserve it after that mishap!

Emily Dextraze said...

enjoy your impromptu holiday at home!
I've never travelled with united, but this is not the first less than stellar trip I've heard with them. check out this song (one of 4) by a musician who's guitar was broken in a flight.
http://youtu.be/5YGc4zOqozo

JCline said...

wow that's crazy. I've had a few situations like that. My town used to only have like one flight in and out a day so if you missed your connection you were screwed. If you call the company they may comp you some more things.. if you want. Sorry your week got off to a not so fun start!